Michelle Obama Reveals Her Relatable Marriage Deal With Barack

Over time, every couple develops their own little agreements—and Barack and Michelle Obama are no different. In her May 13 appearance on Amy Poehler’s “Good Hang” podcast, the former first lady revealed that she and her husband have a long-standing deal when it comes to teasing.

“Teasing is your love language,” suggested Poehler during the conversation. “Oh, for sure,” replied Michelle.

“This is funny because both Barack and Craig Robinson [Michelle’s brother] will say that I don’t let them tease me,” she went on. “See, we have a deal, Barack and I, in our marriage—and it started very early.”

As Michelle explained, their “deal” is that she is allowed to tease him, but not vice versa.

“It’s like, ‘I can tease you, but you cannot tease me,'” Michelle said as Poehler laughed.

“So when he does, I was like, ‘Oh, oh, oh, oh, wait a minute. What’s going on here?’ And he’s like, ‘I’m teasing you.’ I was like, ‘None of that.'”

Poehler chimed in, “He likes to tease!”

Michelle then noted that, as much as Barack may love to tease his family, he “doesn’t stand a chance” once their daughters, Malia and Sasha get involved. “We mercilessly go after him,” she said. “So, yes, teasing is our love language, and I tell him that. I said, ‘When I tease you, it’s like a love tap.'”

Michelle also reflected that her love of teasing came from her mother, Marian Robinson. “She would just scare us […] She would just pop out of places,” she recalled.

While Michelle and Barack may know where they stand on teasing, their relationship hasn’t always been entirely problem-free. As the former first lady said on Steven Bartlett’s The Diary of a CEO podcast, every marriage has its ups and downs.

“There are so many natural reasons why marriage, infertility [and] trying to have kids makes things difficult,” Michelle said. “I try to tell couples, ‘Of course it’s hard. Just listen to what I said, like, if you’re having some issues in your marriage, it’s not you. It’s the process of marriage. It’s just all hard.’”

She added, “I just see people quitting because they look at me and Barack and go, ‘Hashtag couple goals.’ I’m like, ‘It’s hard for us too, but I wouldn’t trade it.’ He is, as the young people say, my person.”